Happiness in the modern fast-pace era seems so elusive that sometimes I think we are in search of the societal label instead of the actual meaning of happiness for each individual.
What does happiness really consist of? When I was younger, I used to think it was getting A’s in all the subjects all the time in school, and getting compliments & acknowledgements from teachers, and this concept lasted until half way through college. When everyone in the same dorm had dates, I thought happiness was having a loving and handsome boyfriend. After coming out of school, people around me all started to have families and make babies, and I thought, yes, those were what I needed to make me happy. That soon transitioned to having a nice house and settle down somewhere with nice neighborhoods and good weather, and with great job opportunities. At work, I thought getting some professional awards could make me happy too.
But were those beliefs sound? They existed for a reason, yes, because those things I listed were what the society deemed “standard/normal” to have/do. You have/do what the peers have, so you can blend in and feel that you belong. However, the question is: do they truly make you happy? The concept of happiness that change with circumstances and does not last cannot hold the promise to last.
After experimentation and a great deal of introspection, I finally am able to put my ingredients of happiness into words: having a goal, having the conviction to reach for it, and seeing progress of the process. Setting a goal sounds very generic, and we all have different goals, but having the conviction to achieve it is very critical. For me, I have strong conviction in self improvement and inspire others, so any goal that I set to improve myself will count. Specifically, the goal also include professional goal and personal goals, when I am clear on the and having specific plans of action to achieve, I feel happy. Happiness should be a process, not an end result. Just like the quote from the movie “The pursuit of happiness”, we should rephrase it into “The happiness of pursuit”.
Where does your happiness lie?